Yestreday was a fairly emotional day for me. Actually, the last few weeks have been.
I’ve had some stuff going with my kids that I haven’t shared, but will when I am ready. Suffice to say my head is a whirl of thoughts, Mother Guilt, knowing I am RIGHT and did the right thing, love, furstration and a bazillion other things. And stupid husband stuff.
Let me clarify, he’s not a stupid husband, he is fabulous. Its the stuff going on with and around him that is stupid. And very annoying. Very, very annoying.
But the last few days, kid stuff aside – normal kid stuff and the other kid stuff – some incredible things have happened.
Well, the Exhibition is not “upcoming” so much as “in three more sleeps”.
I so badly wanted to be there. SO! Badly!
The new website rebuild had eaten into spare funds (damn you, brain, for being so insistant on providing a safe-haven for mums, and damn you mums who seek sanctuary within its awesome community! :P) and, you know, family stuff, hubby’s work hours, and … stuff … just made it near on impossible.
But I wanted it! SO badly. Did I mention this already? That’s how badly I wanted to be there.
With less than one week to go, some incredible things happened. One of the other “subjects” of this exhibition, who has never met me, and didn’t even know my name, started a campaign to get me there.
My gorgeous friend Catherine ran with it and some incredible people – I don’t even know who! – joined in and I was closer to being on my way there.
Yesterday, after some confronting news, I was informed by someone I had contacted to help that they would, indeed, be supporting me on this expedition … and Kellogg’s have come on board and are getting me on a plane. And up to the Sunshine Coast. And home again.
I did push for “please let me stay there for six months” but they said no. But they also said no to my offer to wear a Special K box on my head as a hat, so grateful was I for their assistance.
Meh. What can you do.
For someone who has been in a fairly dark place, where only the negatives are easily viewed, the positives having to be searched for with the aid of a powerful search light and a machette to hack through all that is in the way … I cannot express how this feels.
I was left speechless. I felt undeserving and unable to understand why anyone would do this form me.
Part of this is my sheer inability to suitably thank everyone who contributed, in whatever way they did. Nothing I do, say or offer will truly show my appreciation.
There is no emoticon for what I am feeling.
I hope, at the very least, they realise just how much this means to me, and they feel all warm and fuzzy for having done some a great deed.
I also know that, to date, I have changed, even in some teensy ways, the lives of others. I know that this trip (in three more sleeps!) will conclude some things for me, and open the way to do and be so much more … and hopefully change the lives of others in more than a teensy way.
And, I do declare that is enough fluff and philosophy from me. I am off to shape a cornflakes box into a gown for the evening, and change the children’s meals to sultana bran. Including their school lunches.
Kellogg’s, thank you SO MUCH, and to the other 13 incredible women, whose photographic journey Through Adversity I will be sharing, I’m so honoured to amongst women like you.
As for Bec and Nat and all the other organisers of the Exhibition – you’re awesome!
Now to attempt to confront my pathological need to pack four times the amount of undies that I’ll actually need, and keep my carryon baggage (I hope they’re not referring to emotional baggage????) to under 7 kilos.
Yup, definitely need to curb this “spare pair just in case” obsession …